This is why it's great to have critique partners who are local. If there's a question, you ask them to read it. I used to read all of my best friend's letters for her, and then confirm that they were "safe". But you're right... I'll never forget the heart-felt thank you from an Iraq War veteran who confided that he and his wife had problems when he returned, and they'd used one of my romance novels as a way to restore their relationship. Knowing you were able to make a real difference in someone's life like that is worth all the risk from people who don't want to hear what you have to say.