I had surgery for cancer when I was 35 and single -- my mom came out to stay with me, and my best friend and my dad went to the hospital (in another state!) with me. What matters is community.

When my husband recently went to the same hospital for 6 weeks of cancer treatment, he was on his own. We simply couldn't afford the financial burden of having me out there with him. He had to make do with zoom calls from me and the hospital's support.

That speaks to the nature of systems breakdown, too. What you can afford to do when you're working and getting insurance from your employer, and what you can afford to do when you are retired and on limited insurance, are two entirely different things. Yet those are the people most likely to need expensive, extensive medical care.