And yet, your headline does distill it to a single narrative--trauma. I'm sorry you suffered, but it sounds like the problem was not the adoption, it was your messed up parents. Abuse is traumatic. The adoption was just fuel.
Certainly a lot of messed up people adopt. But that doesn't mean all of them are, or that all adoptions are traumatic. Neither my brother nor I was traumatized. Our birth mothers may have been, quite likely were. But that was the failure of society to adequately support unwed mothers, instead piling them with guilt and shame. That's the source of the trauma, not the adoption itself.